Thursday, November 13, 2008

A Day of Miseries

The day started off gloomy. My brother, Chu, called from Seremban, saying Mak demam. He fetched Mak from kampong early morning and now Mak is in his house in Seremban. Mak has not been well lately. She is already 75. Most women her age has long been sick but she was strong until lately. I am afraid of losing her. I know nothing is permanent, but please, not yet.

UPSR results keluar hari ni. Bang Teh dalam keadaan tidak tenteram. Last night, I told my other children, whatever the results would be, do not make fun of it. I told them, I know the capabilities each and every one of them. I would be more than happy if Teh would get 2As (English and Science) and he will surprised me if he can get a C for his Maths and Bahasa Malaysia. Bila tengok result, he got 1A (English) 3Bs (Maths, Science, BM Penulisan) and 1C (BM Pemahaman). He cried. When I saw him at school, both of us strangle in a hug. I was not frustrated at all. As I said, I knew his capabilities. In fact, I am very proud when he got B for his Maths and Bahasa Malaysia Penulisan. If any of you my 2 readers listen to him talking, you would think that you are listening to a radio version of Spongebob Squarepants! Sooo cartoon and sooo American. And you would be wondering what is so difficult in answering 7 x 8 = 56 when earlier on he can tell you that 8 x 7 = 56. He cried in my arm. He said he might have gotten 4As if he had study much harder. I just kept quiet. My tears was dripping. I am not going to scold him for the results he got. I know, he is good in other area. He is very special to me. And I know he knew.

Back in the office, I am supposed to complete a ‘happy’ proposal. I couldn’t do it. It just doesn’t jive with my feeling. How could I write a happy proposal when I am in the opposite state of mind? My mother is sick. My son is sad. How on earth I can be happy? I surrendered. The day passes by with zero productivity. No mind control thingy can help me today.

2 comments:

  1. How's your mother?... Semuga beransur pulih... memang satu dugaan berat melihat orang yang kita sayang semakin tidak berdaya ... yang mampu kita buat hanyalah terus berdoa dan berikan lebih perhatian dan kasih sayang ... sementara waktu masih mengizinkan .....

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  2. Thanks hazelynn. She said she is ok but I know she is not.

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